Friday Fictioneers: Mousetrap

Photo Prompt © Dale Rogerson

Mousetrap by Kelvin M. Knight

Someone kept leaving flowers. To cheer me up? Fat chance. When I’d finished spraying these boxes silver, perhaps I would smile. Maybe. But once I’d converted the cardboard into metal, I had to connect these huge springs to those sledgehammers and position them above the fists of cheese punched into all my boxes. Then, perhaps then, I could grin. Maybe. I glared at the thumb-sized holes gnawed into the skirting boards. The giant mice here stopped everyone from grinning.

‘You okay, Mickey?’

‘Okay?’ I squeaked. ‘I’ll be okay when they’re all dead!’

Tightlipped, the orderly left me fresh flowers.

(100 words)

___

Thank you to everyone for joining in this week (04/08/17), and reading / liking / commenting on each other’s stories. You don’t have to be a Friday Fictioneer to read / like / comment on the stories so please don’t be shy, there is a mix of styles and storylines all inspired by the same photo.

Thanks, as ever, to Rochelle for hosting Friday Fictioneers so congenially.

 

 

 

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19 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers: Mousetrap

    1. Oh dear, Ivor. More posts today… well one maybe two then a rest as lots of funerals to attend at other end of the British Isles but I will still read first.. I always read first… read more flash fiction , poetry and people’s blogs on life the universe and everything than I write… can I give you a piggyback (this maybe list in translation) or something? 🙃

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  1. Well, Kelvin. You just can’t stop, can you 🙂 I honestly didn’t know how to read this one, and what I saw may surprise you. It was the word “Mickey” that gave me a direction, especially when Mickey responded with a squeak. Mickey Mouse! What a great cartoon this would make!
    Obviously, pennygad didn’t read it the way I did, not even close. She is right about irrational fear, feeling trapped, and as a mental health therapist I have seen both those reactions. And yes, they are uncomfortable.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, granoine for your gracious comment. I hope my little story was viewed as cartoony, exactly, although I am conscious now that some people won’t take it on face value and see something humorous rather than upsetting. Thank you for explaining your credentials, too, so much more clicks into place now. And, yes, i think I am beginning to see now how this irrational fear can become uncomfortable. 😞

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  2. Hmm, well I don’t know what to say about this story. It’s fluent and well told, but are there really people whose mental illness manifests itself like this? I’ve just been reading some rather gritty and realistic stories about mental illness, and its pain for the sufferer, so I’m afraid this grated a little.

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    1. I don’t know whether to you intended the greed pun but I liked it. Peoples’ perceptions never cease to amaze me. And those fears and how they manifest themselves, the worlds they become trapped by are all so unique. Sorry it grated, and felt untrue for you.

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      1. Thank you for replying to my comment. You use two words, ‘fear’ and ‘trapped’. I don’t know if you’ve ever lived with irrational fear, but it’s very unpleasant indeed, and sufferers really are trapped by it, and in it.

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