Posted in FFfAW

Three Into One

Photo prompt by Fandango


Dear Readers

Little did I know when I posted the first version of this story yesterday that it would literally give rise to three versions. I include these below.

The first version (Revision A -bottom of this post) is the one I was happy with until Priceless Joy’s comment, which got me thinking, obviously I had not made my three characters clear, they were grown up but they weren’t men. Out rolled Revision B (middle of this post), which prompted Moon to make an implied observation about what the creature might be. This comment and concerns why these men/not men where here troubled me last night as I slept. First thing this morning, I remembered my last flash fiction story for What Pegman Saw (Crossroad) and my search for wonder. The wonder was not clear in this story, so out popped Revision C – my third and final Revision of this story I promise. This version can be found directly underneath this introduction.

Thank you PrioryHouseblog for being on my wavelength and for seeing that wonder and knowing what I wanted the creature to be but hadn’t made it clear.

And thank you everyone else for letting me share my editing machinations with you.

Hope you enjoy any, or all, Revisions of my story.

Sincerely

Kelvin


THREE INTO ONE (Revision C)

by

Kelvin M. Knight

The peculiar trough was exactly where Lac said it would be. Carefully, they emptied their sacks into each compartment. Albert poured pine cones. Charlie poured moss. Pouring horse chestnuts, Harry whispered, ‘This ain’t never gonna work.’

Holding fingers to their lips, Albert and Charlie glowered at him. Lac said any sound could scare it away.

Shrugging his shoulders, Harry followed them into the undergrowth. Here, the little men waited… for sunset… for the moon to rise… for fists of moths… for darting bats… blue-nosed badgers snuffling at humming tree trunks… the flapping of wings followed by an almighty thud.

Albert nearly gasped. Charlie gripped his mouth. Shaking its mane, the animal stretched mighty wings and leapt towards the trough. First it nosed the moss, then the pine cones. When it chomped the horse chestnuts, Harry squealed like a speared pig.

Wings ripped open the night. Rising rapidly, the animal glared at them with three faces – their faces. Nonchalance, bravado and wonder consumed its black eyes then rose to make its horn glow iridescent white.

(175 words)


THREE INTO ONE (Revision B)

by

Kelvin M. Knight

Rusty daggers sheathed, they approached the trough, each lugging a sack. Into the first compartment, Albert poured…

‘Pine cones?’ Harry snorted. ‘They’ll never work!’

‘Each to their own, Harold.’ Charlie poured moss from his sack into the third compartment of the trough.

‘Well?’ Albert and Charlie looked impatiently at Harry. ‘We haven’t got all night!’

‘Actually we have.’ Looking smug, Harry emptied the horse chestnuts from his sack into the middle compartment.

The little men then scurried into the undergrowth and waited… for sunset… for the moon to rise… for fists of moths… for darting bats… blue-nosed badgers snuffling into view… the flapping of wings followed by an almighty thud.

Albert gasped. Charlie gripped his mouth.

Shaking its mane, the animal stretched its wings and leapt towards the trough. First it nosed the moss, then the pine cones. When it chomped the horse chestnuts, Harry squealed like a speared pig.

Wings ripped open the night. Rising rapidly, the animal glared at them with three faces – their faces, swirling into one, before disappearing into blackness.

(175 words)


THREE INTO ONE (Revision A)

by

Kelvin M. Knight

They approached the makeshift trough, each lugging a sack. Into the first compartment, Albert poured…

‘Pine cones?’ Harry snorted. ‘They’ll never work!’

‘Each to their own, Harold.’ Charlie poured moss from his sack into the third compartment of the trough.

‘Well?’ Albert and Charlie looked impatiently at Harry. ‘We haven’t got all night!’

‘Actually we have.’ Looking smug, Harry emptied the horse chestnuts from his sack into the middle compartment.

Then they scurried into the undergrowth and waited… for the sun to set… the moon to rise… for fists of moths… for darting bats… for blue-nosed badgers snuffling into view… for the flapping of wings followed by that telltale thud.

Albert gasped. Charlie gripped his mouth.

Shaking its mane, the animal stretched its wings and trotted towards the trough. First it nosed the moss, then the pine cones. When it chomped the horse chestnuts, Harry squealed like a speared pig.

Wings ripped open the night. Rising rapidly, the animal glared at them with their faces – three lumps of greenness in one horse-like head.

(175 words)


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This is my 175 word story for the Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers challenge number 151. We are given a photo prompt that is kindly photographed by our participants and approximately 75-175 words with which to create our stories. It’s fun and everyone is invited to participate. For more information, click HERE.

To read all the stories submitted for this challenge, click on the blue froggy button below:

Thanks for reading, writing, liking, commenting, and taking part!

Author:

First and foremost I am a reader, then a storyteller. My reading tastes are eclectic. My writing can focus around the intimacy of closed settings and may tend towards characters who might be hiding something from themselves.

17 thoughts on “Three Into One

  1. ‘The little men then scurried into the undergrowth and waited… for sunset… for the moon to rise… for fists of moths… for darting bats… blue-nosed badgers snuffling into view… the flapping of wings followed by an almighty thud.’
    What a a wonderful world you have created with your words, Kelvin!
    I wonder if ‘their faces swirling into one’means that the little men were gulped down too?!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. A magical moment for sure, Y. And yes twas a unicorn. Thanks for spotting both. and soz for late response, been preoccupied of late. Hence no real presence on FF this week other than my story and none of What Pegman Saw. Hopefully a fuller participation this week. For sure.

      Like

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